Within the last year or so, I've become bitter about Tower and spending time there. In fact, I don't make trips to visit my parents any more often now than I did when I lived in the cities. My mom and I don't always get along and time with her has been difficult for me these last few months. So, as you can imagine, I was reluctant to go up this weekend. It had to be done though. We can't all just forget her birthday like Mike did.

Friday night, I packed the Grand Am with dirty laundry and headed north. I arrived just in time for two straight hours of Dad's favorite tv show, Cowboy U, on CMT. For those of you keeping score, he watched it at least twelve times in the forty-one hours I spent there. Repeats. All repeats.

I promised myself that I was going to put on a happy face and be nothing but pleasant in my interactions with Mom on her fifty-sixth birthday. I'm happy to report that it was surprisingly easy to do!



On Saturday, we headed to Virginia for a day (okay, an hour and a half) of shopping and lunch at Grandma's. We had a really nice time...and I'm not saying that just because I got cute new sweaters. No tension, no arguments, no unsolicited advice. Success! Before heading back, we stopped at Mike and Amanda's to see the fruits of their labor. They've just put wood laminate flooring in the kitchen and hallway, and Amanda refinished all of their cupboards. Their kitchen looks beautiful.

On Saturday night, I was inclined to make points with Grandma so I called and offered her a ride to church. She hemmed and hawed before replying yes, and informing me that her neighbor (and usual chauffeur) would be joining us. Not realizing/caring that they like to get to church twenty-five minutes early for social reasons, I picked them up at about 5:15 for 5:30 mass. When I pulled up to their doors...well, let's just say I've never seen two old ladies haul so much ass before. Like lightning, I tell you.

Grandma is ninety-three years old and the only thing wrong with her is her inability to hear. She absolutely refuses to get a hearing aid because they're expensive and she could die soon. So, we do our best to cope and so does she. It sure made for some entertaining conversation in the car.

Neighbor: Guess who got engaged. Dolores's daughter!
Grandma: WHAT? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOUR WATER?
Neighbor: Not water. Daughter....DAUGHTER!
Grandma: I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. It's hell to get old.

They eventually stopped trying. Grandma will just have to wait until the engagement announcement appears in the newspaper to learn about Dolores's daughter. Thank God her eyes still work.

They sing the best songs in church on Saturday nights! Even better, all the old people sing very loudly and very poorly...which makes me confident enough to belt it out with the worst of them. Added bonus: Grandma isn't the only one at Saturday night mass who can't hear. She's part of a vast majority.

When mass ended, Gram was mobbed like Bob Vila in Sears. To every "Vida, how are you?", she responded, "my kitchen has never been cleaner!" The elderly parish ladies took turns telling me I look cute and asking if I have a boyfriend. Church was followed by rummy, which was followed by more eating, and then sleep.

Today, dinner with the family rounded out a nice weekend in Tower. It feels good to be back home, where I eat food that's remotely healthy. Dark chocolate might be good for my heart, but it does my thighs no favors.

For the first time in ages, I spent a perfectly nice, regretless weekend in Tower. I didn't want to leave early like I usually do, and I'm excited to go back. I'll probably even drive up there next weekend to visit with Red and Darren. It's hard to pass up any time with Red now that she lives so far away. And you never know...mom just might call Aurora and invite her up for the weekend. God knows I could use someone to get drunk with in the Tower bars.